The nation with the Golan

The title of today's post is the text of a well known bumper sticker which is as relevant today as it was when it was first created:

 

Sadly, I suspect you won't be seeing too many of these bumper stickers on cars belonging to the rental fleet of Israel's largest rental company, Eldan. 

My suspicions were aroused when I was surfing the Jerusalem Post web site this morning and I noticed a flash ad for Eldan in their sidebar.  See if you notice anything missing from the map in this screen capture I took of the ad:

 

If you answered 'the entire Golan Heights'... congratulations, you move on to the bonus round!

Now before anyone starts organizing boycotts of Eldan on political grounds, let's just hold on a moment and take a close look at the map in the ad. 

It would be difficult to assume a political prejudice in excluding the Golan Heights because all of Judea and Samaria (the 'west bank') is included... without so much as a dotted line or asterisk.  No, I think this was just a case of ignorance on the part of whoever prepared the ad.

But just to make sure I called up Eldan's corporate headquarters and had the following conversation (all in Hebrew... I'm so proud!):

Receptionist:  Hello Eldan, may I help you?

Me:  Yes, I'd like to speak with whoever is handling the negotiations with the Syrians.

Receptionist:  Excuse me? [side-note: one of the first times I've heard an Israeli say this!]

Me:  I'm calling to speak to the person who is handling negotiations with the Syrian government.

Receptionist:  Can I ask what this is about?  I'm not sure how to direct your call.

Me:  Sure.  I was just on the JPost website and noticed your advertisement in the sidebar.  You seem to have decided to give away the Golan Heights... and I was just wondering what we received in return.

Receptionist:  Em (translation: Um), hold on please.

[A few minutes passed, after which a man picked up the line]

Unidentified male Eldan employee:  Yes, I understand you have a question about one of our advertisements?

Me:  Yes, have you seen the flash ad that is currently running on the JPost site?

Male Eldan employee:  Yes, I'm looking at it now.

Me:  Good, then you noticed that something is missing?

Male Eldan employee:  Em, no... I'm not sure what you're talking about.

Me:  The Golan Heights!  Your company seems to have returned it to the Syrians without telling the Israeli government.  You could have really saved Kadima the election if you'd simply told them that you'd already given it away.

Male Eldan employee:  I know you think you are being funny, but I'm looking at the ad and I see the Golan Heights.

Me:  Oh really?  Describe it for me... where is it exactly on the map?

Male Eldan employee:  It's the finger of land directly above the Kinneret (Sea of Galilee).

Me:  May I ask you a personal question?  How many points in Geography did you do on your Bagruyot (translation: matriculation exams)?

Male Eldan employee: What?!

Me:  And History... did you do any points in History?

Male Eldan employee:  What?!

[As tempted as I was to try to do the whole Samuel L. Jackson "Say what again... I dare you!" speech from Pulp Fiction, I was concerned that it might lose something in the translation]

Me:  OK, let me ask you this.  Have you ever been to the Golan Heights?

Male Eldan employee:  [proudly] Of course.  I've even bicycled around it.

Me:  And did your bicycle tour take you through Syria?

Male Eldan employee:  What?! 

[mental sound of gunshot followed by "Oh I'm sorry.  Did I break your concentration?"]

Me:  I ask because if you look at the map, the only way you could have ridden anything but a boat around the Kinneret is if you traveled through Syria.  You see, that 'finger of land' you talked about before is actually the upper Galilee.  The Golan is more like a hand to the east and northeast of the Kinneret.  Do you see where I'm going with this now?

Male Eldan employee (quietly holding whispered consultations with colleagues) :  Isn't the Golan Heights supposed to be over here?  No, no... that's the Upper Galilee... what about over here... what's that?  Who chose this map?

[after a few moments the male Eldan employee came fully back on the line]

Male Eldan employee:  Sir, I see what you are talking about now.  I'm not sure who designed the ad or where they got the map from, but we will take care of this right away.

Me:  Thank you.  It's bad enough when our government wants to give away the country.  But we shouldn't do it for them.  I'll look forward to seeing the Golan back in our hands.

Today is the 22nd of February.  I wonder how long it will take for the Golan to be returned to the nation.