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Sunday, March 11, 2007


So I suppose you've been wondering what's up with the lack of posts and the spotty responses to comments.

Here's the deal:

Our first two offspring would frequently climb into bed with us (meaning with me) in the middle of the night... and both of them were adept at the fine art of spooning.  By this I mean that they would snuggle their backs into my chest and after a minimum of fussing, they would go back to sleep wedged nicely between my chin and my knees.

I'm assuming that 'forking' is the correct term for whatever is the opposite of 'spooning'.  Our third child 'forks'.

Yonah has always had a knack for doing things his own way... and early morning invasion of the parental bed has proven to be no exception to this rule. 

Like the other kids, he has figured out that trying to insinuate himself into his mother's side of the bed might prove hazardous to his health.  But instead of spooning comfortably into me with his soft little backside and going gently back to sleep, he inexplicably insists on facing me and poking me mercilessly for the rest of the night with his hard little elbows and knees.

Add to this the fact that while he is settling back into sleep mode (a period lasting anywhere from 5 - 45 minutes), he will routinely stroke my beard, pull on my chest hair and trace the outline of my ears, eyes, mouth and nose with his fingers.

I landed last Thursday, and by all rights should be comfortably back on Israel time.  But thanks to my youngest (and last!) child's insistence on 'forking' instead of 'spooning', I feel like I may never get my body clock (and my blog posting) back on schedule.


Posted by David Bogner on March 11, 2007 | Permalink


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I love that term! Forking!! hilarious! I know the feeling. Good luck getting a good night's sleep. maybe nudge him a bit when he does that. if he gets disturbed a few times, maybe he will find a better position in which he can settle down to sleep without getting disturbed, aka spooning instead of forking.

Posted by: Rafi G | Mar 11, 2007 5:11:03 PM

Great term! Love that Yonah is so unique! :)

Posted by: val | Mar 11, 2007 9:23:59 PM

Yonah must be related to my daughter. I have been forked more times than I care to remember.

Posted by: Jack | Mar 11, 2007 11:27:13 PM

When my youngest won't sleep, my wife usually gives up and puts her in the bed with us. Pokes, prods, stroking my beard, tracing outlines, I should be so lucky! Nope, she's a kicker. Sometimes my notice that she's in the bed with us is a foot kicking my stomach, or sometimes she's a little bit lower down on the mattress. That wakes you up quick.

Posted by: Nighthawk700 | Mar 12, 2007 4:08:43 AM

It sounds like a nightmare for sleeping (I have something similar with my dog, actually), but at the same time, it sounds really precious and sweet. Lucky Trep?

Posted by: projgen | Mar 12, 2007 4:11:49 AM

you need a different term, forkin sounds too much like other things. maybe knifing

Posted by: ed | Mar 12, 2007 6:18:02 AM

ahhhhhhhhh enjoy trepp...pretty soon they'll be all grown up and you'll miss being forked

Posted by: marallyn | Mar 12, 2007 10:37:12 AM

Hi Dave,

As at least one other reader mentioned...

Be glad that Yonah only "forks" and doesn't "knife!"

Sending you positive vibes and wishing you and yours well!


Posted by: Maksim-Smelchak | Mar 13, 2007 12:02:49 AM

This too shall pass. Enjoy it while you can.

Posted by: jennifer | Mar 13, 2007 11:59:51 AM

Rafi G... Nudge? Yonah??? He'll take it as an invitation to wrestle!

Val... 'Unique'... now there's a word. :-)

Jack... There's one in every home.

Nighthawk700... Yeah, he kicks too, but only in his sleep. At least when he's awake he is mostly playful. :-)

projgen... I'm really only half complaining because I love that he's so affectionate and curious.

ed... No, I like the word I chose. Instead of the nice orderly spoon drawer it conjures images of a jumble of forks. Get your mind out of the gutter. :-)

marallyn... I agree, but it's still tough to not get enough sleep.

Maksim-Smelchak... You know, now that you mention it... when he climbs on me he seems to be all elbows and knees. That could qualify as knifing. :-)

jennifer... Absolutely (on both counts). Thanks.

Posted by: treppenwitz | Mar 13, 2007 2:44:19 PM

I wonder where the entrepreneur who is going to open hooters eateries in Tel Aviv is going to find his hooters girls? Will observant young ladies show off their tziskis for generous tips? No, I don't think so. Will native sabra girls show off their zoftig home grown hooters for their peers and chaverim in this closeknit society? No...no hooters girls there! Maybe arab girls? Ha Ha Ha Ha! just joking! Hey, maybe he can say that the hooters establishment is a kibbutz and get volunteer girls from europe and america to show off their titties to help eretz yisrael! This might be a fertile area for investigation. These young ladies have been paying their own way for decades to come to kibbutzim, volunteer to do menial work and spread their reglayim for kibbutzniks. If they don't go for this ploy then hooters will just have to fall back on the old standbye strategy. They can shanghai some poor eastern european women. zei gezunt and shalom l'yisrael.

Posted by: moshe rabeynu | Feb 12, 2009 12:06:38 AM

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