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Sunday, October 29, 2006

Funny as a crutch, Rich

Several friends have forwarded the following cartoon to me (original source: MideastTruth.com). 

[click to embiggen]

Like most jokes, the humor can be found in the essential truth behind the statement.  However, I have to say that the small fact of being an Israeli civilian (not to mention the father and husband of some other Israeli civilians), kept my guffaw from turning into a full-blown belly-laugh.

What troubles me is that the world still seems content to treat Iran's very frank statements about wiping Israel off the map... and their equally frank statements about continuing full speed ahead with their nuclear program... as innocent jokes.  In fact, cartoons like the one above seem to be the sum total of the world's response to the Iranian threats!

What has me feeling out of sorts right now is that, short of a pre-emptive nuclear first strike (not very likely with our current appeasement-based leadership), Israel's security from an Iranian nuclear attack is entirely in the hands of people who are trying to derail Iran through sheer force of personality.  So far that plan hasn't met with much success.

So what am I doing to help the cause?

Well, first of all... those pesky Iranians are pretty damned lucky that I can't draw, because I'd be churning out cartoons of Mohamed in some improbable poses and locations, let me tell ya! 

Just in case I can find a cartoonist to collaborate with, I won't give too much away... but suffice it to say that outhouses, rubber fishing waders and the expression 'bombs away' might all play featured roles.

Right now I'm surfing the web to see if I can find toilet paper with passages from the Koran or an image of the prophet Mohamed printed on it.  If I could find TP with both, it would certainly save some time, don't you think? 

I actually have a copy of the Koran at home (from my naive days of trying to understand what all the hate was about), but I'm worried that putting it into the toilet whole might clog up the plumbing.


OK, I feel a tiny bit better now.


Posted by David Bogner on October 29, 2006 | Permalink


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I have found that a page at a time goes down just fine, and is very cathartic. If your particular copy is of high quality, the pages are even soft. (To be used whenever you must listen to some over-educated moron tell you that they wouldn't hate us if only we weren't so immoral -- which sin, of course, justifies killing us. You can look that up in surah number... oh, sorry. Used that one already.)

Posted by: rutimizrachi | Oct 29, 2006 1:41:49 PM

Due to the large number of Muslims who are perfectly normal people and don't want to wipe Israel off the face of the Earth, and don't hate Jews, etc., i'd suggest restricting your cartoonfest to Iranian religious figures like Ayatollah Khomeini, and not get Muhammad into it.

Posted by: Steg (dos iz nit der šteg) | Oct 29, 2006 4:42:00 PM

My powers of imagination are a bit dulled right now - rubber fishing waders? (Outhouses and bombs away are pretty clear...)Then again, maybe I shouldn't ask for a more detailed explanation....

Posted by: westbankmama | Oct 29, 2006 5:11:52 PM

I do see a connection between the waders and the outhouses, especially if they are the only thing worn.
(And I thought I had a strange humour.)

It is my opinion though that the world is not content, but divided and that cartoonists belong to that half of the world which has no interest in Israel being wiped off, having only their talent to do something against it.

Posted by: Chris | Oct 29, 2006 6:57:43 PM

Hmmm... I bet that we can find what you are looking for. The net is a wild and wooly place, someone must be able to assist you.

Posted by: Jack | Oct 29, 2006 8:12:58 PM

Although I personally like the idea of using the Koran in lieu (or "in loo") of the Sears and Roebuck, it could indeed cause problems for indoor plumbing. Besides, as I hear it, the Koran is like John Wayne - rough as a cob and don't take any shit off anybody.

Posted by: Bob | Oct 29, 2006 10:45:48 PM

In what can only be termed as a "boy cries wolf once too often" situation, in two separate incidents, Qurans were found stuffed in the toilets at Pace University (NYC). The perpetrators were not found, but several Jewish organizations have expressed their concern (I presume about the Qurans, not the toilets). The investigation is on-going.

Posted by: Irina | Oct 30, 2006 7:19:01 AM

during the intifada my youngest and i were walking into the malcha mall and the guard stopped my kid...seems he had his koran (5 points bagrut) in his bag and they weren't too happy about him walking into the mall...of course that same mall is overflowing with muslims...STEG...i have heard your theory over and over...and for awhile i bought it...but then i figured...if only 10% of the muslims are terrorists, how come the other 90% aren't saying anything/doing anything?...don't buy that they are afraid of being killed...bombs in the basements of civilian housing will kill them...suicide bombers don't look to see who they are going to blow to smithereens...TREPP great post...didn't mean to rant on here but you touched a sore spot...just sorry i don't know how to draw...i would volunteer...ratz...stay safe

Posted by: marallyn | Oct 30, 2006 8:27:25 AM

A German was actually jailed for creating Koran toilet paper. I kid you not.

Posted by: Jewish Blogmeister | Oct 30, 2006 1:26:49 PM

I could only find this:


Posted by: A Simple Jew | Oct 30, 2006 3:29:47 PM


the muslims i've known say it all the time.

Posted by: Steg (dos iz nit der šteg) | Oct 30, 2006 5:07:20 PM

I don't know how reliable the Jerusalem Post is, but some months ago they posted an interesting article; here the important part:

"[Sheikh Prof. Abdul Hadi Palazzi] believes that Israel exists by "divine right" and that the Koran clearly states (Sura 5:21) that God granted the Land of Israel to the Children of Israel and ordered them to settle there. In addition, it is predicted that before the end of days, God will bring the Children of Israel to retake possession of the Land, gathering them from the different countries and nations (Sura 17:104)."

31.1.2006 by Gail Lichtman at www.jpost.com

Not that this will change much but maybe the question is not about the quality of the tissue alone, but also how it is used.

Posted by: Chris | Oct 30, 2006 5:37:49 PM

STEG...then why aren't they doing anything to stop it?

Posted by: marallyn | Oct 30, 2006 8:44:23 PM

When you search Google in German, you'll find all the news. Oh, right. You guys don't know German. :P
(but I've seen some English blogs about it, too)

A 60 y/o from Muenster/Germany designed a stamp and stamped toilet paper with it. The profit of the sales of these rolls were, according to what he said, to go into a fund for building a memorial for victims of islamism. The man sent sales examples of these printed-on rolls to newspapers, 15 mosques and some tv stations.

this is a photo of the "design" in question:

Posted by: Account Deleted | Nov 3, 2006 1:31:58 PM

I am sure Zahava could aid you in your cartooning efforts, were she so inclined, but really I'm just happy to see you use the word embiggen....

Posted by: mcaryeh | Nov 5, 2006 8:48:19 AM

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