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Monday, July 10, 2006

treppenwitz scavenger hunt

Shortly after we got married, Zahava and I bought out first apartment in Brooklyn.  One of the things I remember from our time there was frequently seeing an imaculately kept garbage truck pass through our Midwood neighborhood which had the following words painted in huge letters on both sides:

"Satisfaction guaranteed or double your rubbish back!"

Now that's a Brooklyn sentiment if ever there was one!

Why am I telling you this?

I'm telling you because I woke up in a foul mood this morning (mostly because I went to bed in a foul mood last night)... and with a terrible headache to boot.

I feel like someone who made the mistake of complaining to that Brooklyn rubbish company... and who was 'lucky' enough to find out the hard way that they were more than happy to make good on their generous guarantee.

I'm sorry Zahava.  I'm sorry Ariella.  I'm sorry Gilad.  I'm sorry Yonah.

I'm sorry I was such a turd yesterday.  I'm sorry I was such an ogre.  No excuses. 

Turd.  Ogre. Me. Sorry.

While I will obviously try to make up with my family for my really vile behavior... since you treppenwitz readers had to suffer through this painful private moment, I have a consolation prize to offer you. 

The first person to find (and email me) a picture of that Brooklyn garbage truck (No fair Photoshopping the words on a picture of a random garbage truck), will receive from me a genuine, new (still in the wrapper) Moleskine Pocket Diary... the official pocket diary of treppenwitz since 1994.

I have yet to locate a picture of this garbage truck on the web, but I can't imagine that something so witty has escaped being immortalized somewhere on the Infobahn.

Thank you for indulging me this selfish use of my journal space today... and of course, good luck to all the eager scavengers.


Posted by David Bogner on July 10, 2006 | Permalink


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I'm poking around a little.

Tell me, when did you live in Brooklyn? How many years ago?

Posted by: Sarah | Jul 10, 2006 2:01:16 PM

Oooh tough one - I see lot of references to that particular promise from all over the world no photos yet though...

What had/has you feeling so lousy?

Posted by: Shifra | Jul 10, 2006 3:48:16 PM

Sorry. Can't play in the scavenger hunt, but I just wanted to commiserate in your crankiness.

Nothing worse then people trying to cheer you up when you really want to wallow in bitterness for a bit.

Re headache: a little ibuprofen, a lot of water.

Posted by: Doctor Bean | Jul 10, 2006 4:29:55 PM

I found a company in Brooklyn that claims to have had that motto on their trucks in the past, but they've changed it. I don't know whether this is true or not- the owner may not have really understood what I was asking. Anyhow the owner said he would try to dig up a picture of their old trucks and email it to me.

Why I just wasted 12 minutes on this, I'll never know.

Posted by: Sarah | Jul 10, 2006 4:58:28 PM

Oh, geez, another drinker of the Moleskine Kool-Aid... I didn't even know these things existed until last year, and suddenly everybody that I know and his sister starts raving about them... I dunno, the way I lose notebooks, and the condition that I usually keep 'em in, means that I'm much better off with the $0.25 spiral notepads.

There *is* a fairly cool Moleskine site that I saw a while back though: This fellow did a regular series of by-request "life-in-Tokyo" sketches in his Moleskine, which he posted regularly.

No luck finding a picture for ya... sorry!

Posted by: efrex | Jul 10, 2006 5:04:12 PM

flowers work sometime but the kids may not appreciate. maybe ice cream. good luck

Posted by: dave | Jul 10, 2006 6:20:53 PM

Man...we was just in Brooklyn yesterday, but the only sign we saw was "You are now leaving Brooklyn, FURGETABOUTIT."

Posted by: jaime | Jul 10, 2006 6:21:04 PM

Sorry. The closest I got to Brooklyn was watching old episodes of Welcome Back Kotter.

But I can say up your nose with a rubber hose.

Let me tell you, 30 years ago that was the height of humor. :)

Posted by: Jack | Jul 10, 2006 6:50:14 PM

David, you left brooklyn in 1997, so the truck may be long gone. i am still in brooklyn, not in midwood anymore, and i cannot recall seeing such a truck. anyway, i read that someone may have found the company so i am waiting to see what the truck looked like.
david s

Posted by: David S. | Jul 10, 2006 8:12:28 PM

I lived in Brooklyn--Borough Park--from 1959 to 1976. I have no memory of such a truck.

Posted by: beth | Jul 10, 2006 8:38:58 PM


Not from brooklyn but from Alaska. Tongass Sanitation - Satisfaction guaranteed or double your garbage back.

Posted by: hoss | Jul 10, 2006 10:04:26 PM

I can't find a picture, but I can provide proof that such a thing did exist:

''Satisfaction guaranteed!!! Or double your garbage back.''

Posted by: Martha | Jul 10, 2006 10:19:32 PM


No picture, but it's a trash pick up company with the same slogan.

Posted by: shmutzy | Jul 10, 2006 10:31:22 PM

I also found the slogan mentioned, but no photos.

Posted by: Rahel | Jul 10, 2006 11:09:27 PM

Sorry, too tired to hunt for pictures... (Spent a couple of hours taking them, though!)... But I hope you're feeling better. A nice walk somewhere pretty is a good way too cheer up!

Posted by: Irina | Jul 11, 2006 12:30:52 AM

P. S. David, everyone gets in a bad mood sometimes. Kol ha-kavod to you for apologizing to your family.

Posted by: Rahel | Jul 11, 2006 8:17:51 AM

Since Brooklyn and the rest of the world are 'only' a dream away from this dark continent, I can only cheer everyone up; after caughing and smoking it's way up a hill this old garbage truck has some interesting words written on it's backside (that's after its caught your attention)... And You thought I was old huh! :)

Posted by: pk | Jul 11, 2006 8:34:17 AM

Sarah... I lived there from 1989 until 1997. Zahava and I got married in 1991 and bought our apartment shortly after that.

Shifra... Having acted like an ass.

Doctor Bean... Thanks, but this was the kind of headache that drugs won't touch.

Sarah... I am indeed impressed with your investigative technique.

Efrex... I was a fan of Moleskine long before every yuppie started carrying them.

Dave... Thanks for the advice. :-)

Jaime... "we was just in Brooklyn yesterday...". Uh, I think you seem to have picked up the local syntax issues. :-)

Jack... It is amazing to me that you haven't been invited on Leno yet.

David S. ... Thanks for helping me with the dates. :-) Regards to your lovely wife and the kids.

Beth... Did they even have Garbage trucks back then? ;-) I'm guessing that a few new developments may have taken place between when you left and when I lived there in the early 90s. :-)

Hoss... You are now the 5th person to send me a link to the Alaska garbage truck with the saying. However I remember quite clearly that the Brooklyn truck used to term 'rubbish', not 'garbage'.

Martha... Thanks. I had stumbled across that as well during my own search. Keep up the good work.

Schmutzy... Close but no Cohiba.

Rahel... Oh well, the search continues.

Irina... Thanks. Feeling much better now.

PK... I am assuming you meant to leave a link to a photo. I'll also assume it was quite funny. :-)

Posted by: treppenwitz | Jul 11, 2006 10:27:13 AM

This aroma therapy truck looks decent too.

Posted by: Jameel @ The Muqata | Jul 11, 2006 12:00:02 PM

Very funny David...very funny (actually as an after thought, I changed it from "I" to "we".)

Posted by: jaime | Jul 11, 2006 5:44:50 PM

Never forget that the Sox actually won one. Miracles happen. ;)

Posted by: Jack | Jul 12, 2006 9:28:49 AM

I know this was an old posting, but I was in NYC visiting friends and realized the truck you're talking about belongs to a garbage pickup company owned by my parents friends. I will get you a pic soon.

Posted by: amber | Dec 14, 2006 5:16:32 AM

just click on this profile and scroll down and there is a pic of the truck

Posted by: amber | Dec 14, 2006 6:06:42 AM


sorry here is the link

Posted by: amber | Dec 14, 2006 6:08:42 AM

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