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Thursday, January 01, 2004

A true romantic

By cinematic standards, I failed the basic romance test last night. Midnight found me flat on my back under my sink. Having just finished hanging my medicine cabinet over my sink, I was putting the finishing touches on the legs supporting the basin. No bubbly...no Auld Lang syne...no lingering kiss....and nothing that could be considered by conventional standards to be even remotely romantic (unless one considers 'plumber's smile' romantic). Yet, as will soon be made clear, I was doing something truly romantic.

Lest the reader begin to think that our marriage is in trouble, perhaps some additional information is in order. First of all, it is important to understand that, here in Israel, people don’t make a big deal about New Year’s Eve like they do elsewhere in the world. January 1st is even a regular workday! Don’t get me wrong, some Israelis mark the occasion with parties and such, but nothing like one finds in the U.S. or Europe.

Zahava and I never made a big deal about New Year’s eve back in the ‘states. Once or twice we went to parties, but more often than not, New Year's Eve meant renting a movie, staying at home, and eating popcorn in front of a roaring fire.

So, where is the romance in doing a little late night home repair, you ask? A clue can be found above in the oddly possessive way I referred to the fixtures I was installing. Yes, that’s right. The sink and medicine cabinet I was installing are MINE, ALL MINE!!! Still not feeling the love? Then let me bring you up to speed:

Zahava and I have been married for 12+ years. In all that time…in every place we’ve lived…we have always shared a bathroom sink and medicine cabinet. Sounds like a typical arrangement, right? Sure…for a few months everything would be fine and amicable. But then, without warning, Zahava’s ‘things’ would begin to creep towards mine. I’m not talking about mingling, mind you. No, no…I could deal with my toothpaste fraternizing with her eyeliner. But that’s not what we’re talking about here. Somehow her things would begin to push and nudge my things out of the way. Before long, my toothbrush, razor and deodorant would be relegated to some dark corner of the bathroom, or crowded into a box in the linen closet. I’m not accusing Zahava of having a hand in any of this. She just seems to have really pushy stuff.

Well, when we first began house hunting in Efrat, I decided that I was going to have my own sink and medicine cabinet, even if it had to be somewhere other than the bathroom. Last night’s bit of home improvement put the finishing touches on this new bastion of manliness. The basin consists of a dark wood washing stand, supporting a brushed stainless steel basin. The medicine cabinet is also a very nice dark wood. All of this manly goodness resides on my side of our bedroom. The bathroom sink and (soon to be installed) medicine cabinet are now my wife’s exclusive domain. She can spread out her creams, scrubs, and lotions to her hearts delight. She can balance cotton balls, lipsticks, and q-tips on every visible surface. Heck, she can even create modern sculpture out of her make-up jars and tubes. You see, IT’S ALL HERS!

Now if that’s not romance, I don’t know what is.

For a glimpse of my own little slice of personal hygiene heaven, click here.

Posted by David Bogner on January 1, 2004 | Permalink


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You are TOO funny... That sink looks SO lonesome all by itself...

Hey, but if YOU'RE happy, then we're all happy!

Love ya, brothah!


Posted by: val | Jan 4, 2004 10:02:12 PM

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