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Sunday, October 05, 2008

So that's what I've been eating!

I know this is going to make me sound like a complete idiot... but what the heck, that shouldn't shock many of you.

A couple of years ago I started wearing reading glasses.  It began with drug store readers to deal with the typical 'getting older' thing... and eventually landed me in an Optometrist's office where I discovered that a lifetime of dyslexia was actually caused by poorly aligned eyes.

Anyway, as my reading prescription has gotten steadily stronger, I've had to come to terms with the fact that in order to see anything within arm's reach, I need to have my glasses on.  So you'd think that I'd also realize that in order to see what's on my dinner plate, the glasses might come in handy.  Makes sense, right?

Well, I'm embarrassed to admit that this never occurred to me. 

Reading... working on the computer?   Obviously I need glasses.  But eating?  No thanks... I'd rather spend years pushing stuff around my plate until it falls onto my fork and then surprises me by being a slice of sweet potato instead of a carrot.

Like I said... idiot.

This weekend I had a bit of an epiphany when I got up from reading on the couch and sat down to eat lunch without taking off my reading glasses.  I was shocked to actually see what I as eating!  All this time I've been thinking of them as 'reading' glasses and using them as such.  But now I realize they're also 'eating' glasses.

Who knew!?

Posted by David Bogner on October 5, 2008 | Permalink


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Very cool. I've been going to your Optometrist for the past few weeks for vision therapy. He's been helping me out with spatial issues - it turns out I have trouble accurately determining how far objects are away, which has affected me in a number of ways. If this works - it will really be amazing!

Posted by: Dave (Balashon) | Oct 5, 2008 12:04:52 PM

"I'd rather spend years pushing stuff around my plate until it falls onto my fork and then surprises me by being a slice of sweet potato instead of a carrot."


You do have a way of making the horrors of aging feel pleasantly funny. May Hashem bless us that you are still funny, and I am still around to read you, when we return to the Pablum stage of life...

Posted by: rutimizrachi | Oct 5, 2008 12:35:11 PM

Thanks for the laugh. Personally, I take off my glasses to eat. They steam up and then I can't even see the plate, much less what's on it. :)

Posted by: triLcat | Oct 5, 2008 12:54:25 PM

its even easier when you wear contact lenses - the decision is made for you that you see everything - even things that you DON'T want to see.

oh how i look forward to aging as gracefully as you (now............wait a second, you are not aging, not at all, you are still young,.....its just your eyesight that is aging because of environmental factors, yeah, that's it!!!)

Posted by: Hadassah | Oct 5, 2008 1:51:47 PM

It's not as though you couldn't smell Zahava's amazing cooking... :-)

I'm surprised you're not wearing contacts already; I assume there's a good reason.

Posted by: tnspr569 | Oct 5, 2008 2:41:56 PM

It's not a vision thing.....

Our arms actually get shorter as we age.....MUCH shorter.

I first noticed this when I had to have the waiter at the local Chinese restaurant hold the menu for me.

Posted by: Ziggy | Oct 5, 2008 4:21:02 PM

I finally gave in and bought a pair of reading glasses.

So, I'm sitting in bed reading, wearing my glasses for the first or second time, and my youngest daughter comes into the room. She takes one look at me, and bursts out laughing.

No mercy!

Posted by: Rivka with a capital A | Oct 5, 2008 5:49:28 PM

I've heard of people wanting the element of surprise for stuff like finding out the gender of their unborn child, what they're getting as a gift, but what tehy're putting in their mouth is a new one for me..

I always wondered who would actually press "I'm feeling lucky" on the google home page...

Posted by: Shevy | Oct 5, 2008 5:54:16 PM

Just remember just because they are now eating glasses doesn't mean you should eat them. :)

Posted by: Child Ish Behavior | Oct 6, 2008 1:57:40 AM

Oh, baby, welcome to the club. I started wearing bifocal contacts a few years ago to avoid the "bubby" glasses. The contacts are perfect for someone who sings in a choir. I can see the conductor AND the music. You do give up some distance vision, and I find myself squinting at the TV to check the post season baseball scores at the top of the screen (As of now, Boston is losing to the Angels, 1-0. Sorry, Dave)So I switch to glasses for TV viewing. Hang in there. It's only going to get....worse.G'mar Tov to everyone here!..(and let's go Phillies!)

Posted by: Marsha in Englewood | Oct 6, 2008 2:19:50 AM

When I read the words "eating glasses", somewhere in the recesses of my brain I heard a rim shot.

Posted by: Bob | Oct 6, 2008 4:19:49 AM

When I read the words "eating glasses", somewhere in the recesses of my brain I heard a rim shot.

Posted by: Bob | Oct 6, 2008 4:20:09 AM

When I read the words "eating glasses", somewhere in the recesses of my brain I heard a rim shot.

Posted by: Bob | Oct 6, 2008 4:20:13 AM

This is a freaky coincidence. We were born in the same year. I too had the food "Eureka" moment about a week ago in a cafe!!! I couldn't believe how interesting my food was when I left my reading glasses on. You prompted me to post about this delightful induction into middle age;-)

Posted by: Noa | Oct 6, 2008 7:33:48 AM

I've been in bifocals since about age nine or ten, so I can always see what I eat. But learning how to go down a flight of stairs with bifocals was a trip, lemme tell ya....

Posted by: Rahel | Oct 6, 2008 12:53:51 PM

That would explain why I keep aiming for the broccoli and somehow end up eating the brownies.

Posted by: Evan | Oct 6, 2008 4:11:50 PM

huh... wow... would you just LOOK at my lunch. I can SEE it now!

Posted by: weese | Oct 6, 2008 6:59:09 PM

I remember the profound disquiet I felt when, about nine years ago, I realized that my close vision was starting to go.

Progressive lenses did the trick for me. One pair of glasses I can wear all the time. I highly recommend them.

And never do I have to play "Food Roulette." Honestly, David...I prefer knowing what's about to be loaded into my slavering, anxious Pie-Hole. There are some surprises I'd just as soon not have...and in the interest of everyone's delicate sensibilities, I'll avoid providing specific examples. Heh!

Posted by: Elisson | Oct 6, 2008 10:50:11 PM

David, Shana tova!
Can you post the name of this optometrist so I can visit him?

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