Wanting vs. Missing

The other day I wrote that I could now officially say that I wanted for nothing here in our new country. I was happy… I had just ‘discovered’ a source for really good freshly roasted coffee beans… I was giddy… it was clearly too much for somebody.

As has become the trend (just look at yesterday’s comments) someone had to call me on it and demanded to know if there is truly nothing I miss from ‘the old country’.

This is just proof that people don’t pay attention when they read. I never said (or even implied) that I didn’t miss things from the states… I simply said that I didn’t want for anything here. There is a difference… a big one, in fact.

One implies that I have everything I need (which I do). The other suggests that I have undergone some sort of brainwashing/deprogramming which has wiped away a lifetime’s worth of likes, dislikes and experiences… not gonna happen, people.

On the one hand, a very important part of a successful absorption into any society is letting go of many of the things that were previously taken for granted.

For instance… the simple pleasure of not having to bag one’s own groceries… that is something I always took for granted, but which I have learned to live without here.

Another good example would be driving to work without a gun next to the gearshift. Now, granted there were sections of my old commute (especially in the Bronx) where I sometimes wished I had something, other than my charm, for self protection… but for the most part, I have made my peace with this small inconvenience as well, and barely notice it. I’m sure there are other equally apt examples, but for now you get the idea.

But just plain missing things… that is something that is always there (like a phantom itch), which will always separate me from Israelis who have never lived abroad.

Take, for example, diners. Granted, it’s been a very long time since I’ve ordered a BLT with a chocolate milkshake (with the leftover shake in the metal blender cup) or a turkey club on white toast (heavy on the mayo) in a diner… what with keeping kosher, and all. Even after I started keeping kosher (and especially during my Route 66 trip) I frequently popped into vintage diners to order a cup of coffee, a couple of hard-boiled eggs (in the shell, thank you) and maybe one of those little single-serving boxes of Kellogg’s breakfast cereal. You see, that was the beauty of a diner… the real ones were open 24 hours and served breakfast at any time of the day or night, no questions asked. Try finding a comfortable place to sit drinking coffee at 3:00AM in Israel!

Another thing… New England in the Fall (especially the Merritt Parkway) is something else that will always be there… calling to me the way an open package of chocolate calls to my wife. Since I don’t see myself making scheduled trips to the states in the Fall (what with the kids in school, the Jewish holidays, work, etc.), I have resigned myself to looking at pictures and webcams of the fall foliage.

Xmas songs. I’ll bet you didn’t see that one coming! Yes, I’ll admit it… I love that time of year when all the radio stations (and mall loudspeakers) spew an endless stream of these hokey old songs. Heck, most of 'em were written or performed by Jews, so stop staring at me that way! Let’s face it… I don’t care if you’re Sihk, Buddhist, Rastafarian or Druid… you can’t grow up in New England and not develop a soft spot for all those sappy carols. ‘Jingle Bell Rock’, yeah baby! I guess Internet radio will have to suffice.

What else?

I have an idea… why don’t some of the Israelis (or any expats living abroad) chime in with the things you don’t absolutely need… but, which in weak moments, you sorely miss.

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